Kevin Keller sets January wedding
The Huffington Post informs us that Riverdale denizon Kevin Keller will tie the knot this January with his fiancé Clay Walker. It wasn't that long ago that Riverdale got it's first openly gay resident (Moose and his beard Midge not withstanding) but considering that his introduction broke sales records for the company this development shouldn't be unexpected.
Of course, everyone isn't happy. Peter Spriggs of the Family Research Council says “It's unfortunate that a comic book series usually seen as depicting innocent, all-American life is now being used to advance the sexual revolution, I think whatever boost in sales might come from the novelty or curiosity factors will be more than offset by the number of both kids and parents who will be turned off by this storyline and its obvious social and political agenda.” Since in Riverdale they are of course remaining virgins until their wedding night it is hard to understand what his beef is.
Seriously though, if we don’t do anything, America’s going to be in trouble. With this comic book coming out (no pun intended) and Chaz Bono dancing with stars, it’s only a matter of time before every child out there is a gay married transsexual. Because, as all science will tell you, children merely have to set eyes on LGBT people and they instantly turn into one themselves. It’s like the alternate lifestyle version of Medusa and stone.
Of course, this is said tongue in cheek. They do point out that in one year Kevin Keller is ready to marry while for nearly 60 years Archie has failed to make an honest woman of neither Veronica nor Betty.